Warning: Reading this newsletter will NOT make you a great public speaker

Why Discipline and Consistency Beat Motivation Every Time

The start of a new year can feel like a blank page, a chance to start fresh and rewrite your story. Like me, you may have reflected on the year that has been over the holidays. In January we love to dream big. This year we're going to become this new person, it’s all going to be different from now on: new goals, new habits, new skills. But here’s what nobody tells you: dreaming is easy. What’s hard is the grind it takes to turn those dreams into reality. That applies to public speaking as well.

If you’re hoping this newsletter will magically transform you into a confident speaker, let me save you some time: it won’t. What it will do, however, is show you the uncomfortable truths and essential steps that can get you closer to that goal, if you’re willing to work for it.

Will you make 2025 your year of Speaking with Confidence?

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Discipline and consistency

Public speaking, like mastering any skill, takes discipline and consistency. In my last newsletter I wrote about my goal-setting process and how I set an annual theme at the beginning of each year. Setting goals for yourself is helpful because it fosters discipline and consistency. Everything you’ve learned so far wasn’t achieved by accident. Growth is painful, and it takes time and dedication. The first stages are really, really hard; we’ve all been there. That’s why setting a goal is scary: we’re committing to achieving something we haven’t yet mastered. Thoughts like, ‘What if I fail?’ will run through your mind. But what if you fly? If you choose a goal that truly matters to you and you’re determined to achieve, you’ll find the discipline to work on it, even when you don’t feel like it. You’ll stay consistent, even on days when motivation is lacking, because motivation alone isn’t enough. I learned this the hard way when I attempted to become a surfer.

In my early years in Australia, I was keen to learn how to surf. After all, Australia is a surfer’s paradise. I imagined myself becoming this great surfer, heading out to catch some waves at Australia’s most beautiful beaches. Filled with optimism, I signed up for a five-day intensive surf camp. By the end of it, I had spent hours tumbling in the whitewash, gulping salt water, and crash-landing on the beach. I kept at it sporadically and did some weekend trips with friends along the NSW coast. But despite my initial enthusiasm, I never became the surfer I dreamed of.

Why? Because motivation alone wasn’t going to get me there. To master surfing, I would’ve needed discipline and consistency—heading out rain or shine three mornings a week, every week, for months on end. Instead, I surfed four times in an entire year. The result? Three years later, my surfboard and wetsuit are gathering dust in the garage.

Mastery

This story is just an example of trying to learn any new skill, just like public speaking. You can get inspired by watching fabulous TED talks or scrolling through TikToks packed with tips and tricks to become a better speaker. But without putting in the work, consistently, you’ll never reach that moment of feeling confident when getting onto that stage.

I’m currently reading The Diary of a CEO by Steven Bartlett, and I think it’s a great read for anyone interested in personal and professional development. In the book Steven describes 33 laws of business & life. Law #2 is: To master it, you must create an obligation to teach. Those of you who are familiar with Steven Bartlett and his incredibly popular podcast The Diary Of A CEO, may know him as a very confident speaker. As he describes it himself in the book, today he is ‘rubbing shoulders with some of the very best [speakers] to ever do it’. What many, myself included, may not know, is that Steven once had extreme stage fright. How did he change from being ‘a train wreck of a public speaker’ to the confident speaker that he is today?

Social contract

Steven describes that he made a promise to himself that every day at 7pm he would write a tweet or make a video and post it online at 8pm. By doing this, he made learning, then writing/recording and sharing it online, a daily obligation, not just an interest.

By posting online every day, he also created a social contract. People started following him for these daily posts and that held him accountable. Publicly committing to something gives you skin in the game. My key insight is this: if you want to master something, do it publicly and consistently. And that’s exactly what I did with public speaking myself.

In 2023 I made the commitment to myself that I wanted to become really good at public speaking. Not just good enough—I wanted to excel and feel completely confident on stage. I joined a Toastmasters club and became more conscious of speaking opportunities at work. In addition, I started posting my learnings on LinkedIn. It was my way of holding myself accountable and ensuring progress toward this goal. Did I have moments where I doubted myself? Tonnes! Did I have meetings that I dreaded that I raised my hand because I felt like I didn’t have enough time to prepare. Many! But because I knew what my end goal was, because I had been posting about this journey online and because I did not want to fail in front of my network, I succeeded. I surpassed my own expectations and founded Brava a year and a half later.

With Brava I aim to support others on their public speaking journey. To gain confidence and acquire tools that will help you become a better speaker. 2025 is here, and there’s no better time to commit to becoming the speaker you’ve always wanted to be. But let me be honest: it won’t happen by accident. The real question is: will you put in the work?

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What’s next

In Australia the wedding season is in full swing, in Europe it’s not far away. Next week I’ll share my insights into what makes a great wedding speech and how to write yours.